From the Blog also at dylan.blog
I BUILT AN AUTHOR WEBSITE AND NOW I HAVE TO BE AN AUTHOR, WHICH IS HONESTLY THE SCARIEST PART
April 10, 2026Something happened in the last few months that I didn’t plan for. I started acting like a writer again. I’m not writing in a journal everyday. It is…
MUPPET OF THE WEEK: Gonzo the Great — The Radical Freedom Of Not Knowing What You Are
April 6, 2026“I have a dream too! …I want to go to Bombay, India and become a movie star." Nobody asked. Nobody understood. Nobody could explain why this made sen…
Getting Back on the Bike (My Dang Ol' Derelict Ankle Part ???)
March 31, 2026I rode the Peloton today. For ten minutes. No class, no leaderboard, no metrics that matter. Just pedaling. It has been nine months since I’ve been o…
MUPPET OF THE WEEK: Pepe the King Prawn — Confidence Is Just Lying To Yourself Until It Works
March 30, 2026“You tell him, and I will smack you. I will smack you like a bad, bad donkey, okay!" This is a threat from a crustacean approximately eight inches ta…
The Longest Slow Motion
March 29, 2026Nobody tells you that watching your parents age is a slow-motion version of every emergency you’ve ever prepared for, except there’s no emergency. Th…
MY WIFE KNITS ME SOCKS AND NOW EVERY STORE-BOUGHT SOCK IS A PERSONAL INSULT
March 28, 2026I need to talk about socks. Not in a “fun quirky gift idea” way. In a “my wife has been hand-knitting me socks for over a decade and I am now physica…
Grapes Are Just Candy That Got Away With It
March 27, 2026I need to talk about grapes. Not in a “here’s a recipe” way or a “let me tell you about the health benefits of antioxidants” way. I just need someone…
The Loud Silence Under Twenty Feet of Water
March 26, 2026You never really know what you’re missing until it’s out of your reach. I learned to SCUBA dive when I was young — early teens — because my Uncle Kev…
I KNOW They're Going to Fall in Love and I DO NOT CARE: A Completely Normal Essay About Fauxmance
March 25, 2026I know exactly how it’s going to end. I know from page one. I know from the back cover summary. I know from the second one of them says “what if we j…
Someone Else's Story Saved Mine (And Then I Wrote My Own)
March 24, 2026I think fiction might be the most important thing humans have ever invented and I am including fire and antibiotics in that statement. That’s probabl…